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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24863011">It All Means I Love You</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/PalavaRakkaus/pseuds/PalavaRakkaus'>PalavaRakkaus</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Hearts of Kirkwall [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dragon Age (Video Games)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Caretaking, Fluff, I have never touched the source material, It's getting too soft, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Smut, So much smut</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 08:42:38</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,044</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24863011</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/PalavaRakkaus/pseuds/PalavaRakkaus</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Anders and Fenris are so in love. Every moment they share, both in bed and outside it, is precious, so why not make it official?</p><p>Of course Anders doesn't choose the most conventional setting for his proposal. Will Fenris still stay yes to him, one more time?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anders/Fenris (Dragon Age)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Hearts of Kirkwall [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1639237</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>64</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Anders didn't bother to look up from his papers as he heard the door opening; Justice had already felt the presence of Fenris's lyrium outside, and the quiet, light footsteps on the dusty floor couldn't belong to anyone else but his elf.</p><p>"I'm almost finished," he called as he dipped his quill into the ink. "Won't take long."</p><p>"No rush," Fenris told him.</p><p>Anders focused on finishing his chapter as fast as he could anyway. As he wrote, he could hear Fenris puttering around, straightening the cots and picking up things Anders had forgotten somewhere when he'd been busy with his patients. Fenris was so at home here these days, familiar with everything and as comfortable as if he'd spent his whole life with Anders. He wasn't sure if it was possible at this point, but it may have made him love Fenris even more.</p><p>He dipped his quill into the ink once more, wrote three more words, placed the final period after them, and then he was done for the day. Satisfied, he wiped his quill clean, set it down and capped the ink bottle.</p><p>When he looked up, he realised Fenris had stopped next to him.</p><p>"Going well?" the elf asked, inclining his head towards the pile of papers on the desk.</p><p>Anders nodded. He'd have to rewrite today's chapter—he'd already thought of a few things he needed to add and clearer wording for some parts—but it was looking pretty good. The important things were all there.</p><p>"I managed to write what I was planning to," he said carefully.</p><p>He knew Fenris was not fond of this side of his work. <em>I'm not joining your war</em>, the elf had told him once, and Anders avoided talking too much about his battle for mage rights. Justice felt Fenris would understand and they should involve him more, but Anders didn't think it was worth it; his work was, and would always be important, but he was not going to let it lead to an unnecessary fight with Fenris. He would never stop, not before the change he wanted finally happened, but he preferred not to upset Fenris with the topic.</p><p>"Good." Fenris leant down to kiss him on the cheek. "How long till you have it finished, then? The whole manifesto?"</p><p>Anders blinked at him. "…I'm not sure. I. Er. You probably don't want to hear about it anyway."</p><p>"Anders. Love." Fenris took his face between his hands. His voice had gone very soft, and his eyes were serious as they met Anders'. "I do."</p><p>Anders blinked up at him. "Really?"</p><p>"Of course. I won't pretend to agree with all your beliefs, but I will not stand in the way of your dream. I worry that you will go too far and put yourself in danger, but I have accepted that this fight is a part of who you are, and I respect that. It's important to you and to Justice, and you two are important to me, so yes, I do want to hear about."</p><p>Anders didn't know what to say. He could only sit there, looking up at Fenris, as he tried to parse that little speech. Justice was delighted, and, fortunately, too dignified to gloat because he'd been right about involving Fenris more.</p><p>Fenris kissed him, on the forehead this time. "Over the months we've been together, you've hardly mentioned your manifesto and your goals to me. I heard much more about them before that, to my annoyance." He offered Anders a tiny smile. "I know you keep writing anyway. Perhaps doing other things I never get to hear about. You should talk to me, I will not be upset. I want you to know that you can always tell me everything, because in the end, I am on your side, even if I am not on the side of all other mages."</p><p>"I love you so much," Anders blurted.</p><p>Fenris laughed, warm and gentle "I know. I love you too." He took Anders' hand in his and pulled him to his feet. "Don't leave me out. It makes me fear I won't be able to protect you if something happens."</p><p>"You think I'll do something stupid."</p><p>"You and Justice both, I fear," Fenris said, serious eyes focused on Anders'. He swiped a stray strand of hair behind Anders' ear. "I know how this frustrates you at times, and I don't want either of you doing anything rash without my knowledge. If you get yourselves in trouble, I want to be there to pull you back out. Will you let me?"</p><p>How could have Anders said no to that?</p><p>"I will," he promised. "We will. I'll keep you up to date."</p><p>Fenris kissed the tip of his nose. "Good. Thank you. So how long until it is finished?"</p><p>"I don't know, honestly. It's a lot of work—there's so much to be said." He glanced at the papers. "Sometimes I think it won't make a damn difference even if I finish it, but I can't give up either."</p><p>"It will make a difference." Fenris cupped his cheek and looked him in the eye. "I have faith in you. What you do matters."</p><p>"That means a lot," Anders said quietly.</p><p>There were times when he lacked faith in himself and in everything he did, times when he was sure he was wrong and useless and fighting a losing battle, but maybe now, when he could talk about those thoughts with Fenris, getting over them would be easier. He was only one man with a spirit against a force many times stronger than him, but that didn't mean he was <em>alone</em>.</p><p>"I really do love you," he whispered.</p><p>Fenris pecked him on the lips. "I know, my brave mage. Now, if you're ready to take a break from your work…" He gave Anders' hand, still held in his, a little tug. "I have something for you."</p><p>He nodded towards the table, and Anders' eyes fell on a very familiar-looking basket, with an equally familiar chequered cloth covering it. That basket always meant Fenris had brought him something particularly delicious, and Anders' stomach growled at the sight, loud enough that Fenris had to hear it, if the smile on the elf's face was any indication.</p><p>"I know you're hungry," Fenris said, pulling him towards the table, "but first, would you close your eyes?"</p><p>Anders frowned as they stopped next to the table. "Why?"</p><p>Fenris rolled his eyes. "Just do it."</p><p>Anders did. Fenris could have asked him to do almost anything and he would have agreed.</p><p>"I promised you a gift, and then forgot about it," Fenris said. He shifted Anders' hand between both of his. "I'm sorry I did, love, but here it is."</p><p>Fenris placed something on his palm, something light and smooth, and Anders' eyes flew open.</p><p>Fenris huffed. "I cannot trust you to keep your eyes closed for any reasonable time, can I?"</p><p>Anders ignored him. There, on his palm, rested a silk ribbon, gold-brown, embroidered with a complicated golden pattern. Anders trailed a finger along it.</p><p>"Maker, it's so beautiful," he whispered.</p><p>"Perfect for you, then," Fenris said.</p><p>"Shut up," Anders said. "I… Oh, Fenris. Thank you." He wrapped his arms around Fenris and hugged him tight, the elf's face pressed to his neck. "Put it on me now," he whispered into Fenris's ear.</p><p>"We're going to bed after dinner, would it be silly—"</p><p>"Put it on me," Anders interrupted. "I want it."</p><p>"Idiot," Fenris said, but he pulled back and took the ribbon from Anders' hand, gave him a nudge so that he turned around, and then, the touch of his hands light and careful, tied it on top of the green ribbon. "There. It does look as lovely on you as I imagined."</p><p>"Thank you."</p><p>Fenris put his arms around Anders from behind and held him, bodies flush together, face pressed into his hair. He was so warm and familiar and Anders loved him like mad.</p><p>"I can never get anything for you," he said as he covered Fenris's hands on his chest with his own. "And even if I had the coin, I don't know what I would buy."</p><p>"I don't want you to buy me anything." Fenris kissed the back of his neck. "The way you smile when I give you something is the only gift I need. It still makes you happy to wear the green ribbon, and it makes me happy to see that. You react with such joy to a smallest gift, and I love it."</p><p>"I've never…" Anders trailed off. "No one's hardly bothered getting me things in the past. Or been in the position to get them. It's just a ribbon, except it's a lot more than a ribbon because you got it for me." He turned around in Fenris's hold and gave him an embarrassed smile. "I don't make much sense, do I?"</p><p>"You rarely do." Fenris kissed his cheek and squeezes him close. "I don't mind." Another kiss. "We should have our dinner. You're hungry, and it'll get cold otherwise."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Dinner turned out to be fresh bread and roast with carrots and onions. Fenris had wrapped the pot in a thick wool cloth, and the food was still hot as he spooned a generous portion on Anders' plate. Anders wolfed down the first delicious plateful before Fenris had finished even a half of his own, and when the elf nodded towards the pot, filled his plate again and got himself another piece of the bread. It would have been wasteful not to eat all of it, after all, and Anders had really been hungry.</p><p>They ate in silence; Anders had no time to speak between mouthfuls, and Fenris seemed content enough to look at him. The elf kept smiling fondly at him every time Anders paused enough to look up, and it warmed him at least as much as the food did.</p><p>When they were finished, they cleared the table and washed the dishes together. Andraste knew it was nothing more than one of those boring routines of day-to-day life, but Anders found himself enjoying even that when he had Fenris next to him. These domestic little things had gained new importance when he'd been able to share them with Fenris, and he would have not given them up for anything.</p><p>It was ridiculous how in love with the elf he still was, and he never wanted that to change.</p><p>"Bedtime?" Fenris asked as he put the last plate on its proper place after drying it.</p><p>"Depends entirely on what you're planning to do in the bed." Anders hooked a finger into Fenris's belt and pulled him closer. "Because if that's <em>me</em>, I definitely agree."</p><p>Fenris snorted and shook his head. "We have to be up early tomorrow morning," he pointed out.</p><p>He was right, of course; they'd promised to go along with Hawke and Isabela to take care of some bandits that had been terrorising those travelling in and out of Kirkwall, but—</p><p>"I sleep better after sex. You know that."</p><p>Fenris huffed, rolling his eyes. "Idiot," he said, voice full of fondness as he cupped Anders' cheek. "I just cannot say no to you, can I?"</p><p>Anders grinned at him. "You're delightfully bad at it."</p><p>"You awful man," Fenris said, and took Anders' hand in his own. "Come on, then."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There were very few things Anders enjoyed more than lying naked in bed with an equally naked Fenris on top of him, Fenris's mouth touching whichever part of his anatomy the elf had chosen to bless. Currently, that part was Anders' own mouth, and he could have not been happier.</p><p>They kissed slowly, tasting each other, Fenris's hands holding Anders' face between them. Every kiss was tender and perfect, and Anders let them overwhelm him until there was nothing else in the world. He was lucky to have a lover who, aside from being otherwise perfect, enjoyed kissing him as much as Anders enjoyed being kissed.</p><p>With a final peck on Anders' lips, Fenris pulled back and met his eyes, familiar gentle warmth in his gaze. Anders would never grow tired of that; though Fenris was not afraid of expressing his feelings otherwise, his eyes and hands still said much more than any words ever could. When it was just the two of them, his entire being radiated love.</p><p>For a while, they did nothing but look at each other, and Anders hoped his own face could portray his feelings half as well Fenris's did. The way the elf smiled at him suggested he was doing well enough.</p><p>The smile stayed on Fenris's face as he lowered his mouth on Anders' neck. Anders tilted his head back, and Fenris hummed against his skin and gave him a gentle, delicious bite below his jaw before trailing kisses down his throat, overs his collarbones and to his chest. The occasional sharp hint of teeth had Anders arching up from the bed, his body demanding more.</p><p>The kisses continued, a random pattern down his belly, around his navel, and it was clear where Fenris was headed. Anders held his breath as Fenris's tongue darted out to lick around the sensitive tip of his hardness and then gasped as, without a warning, the elf swallowed him down.</p><p>"Fenris," he managed to whisper, and Fenris hummed around him, sending waves of pleasure through him.</p><p>Anders pushed his fingers into the thick white silk of Fenris's hair. It was not fair how good Fenris was with his mouth. His tongue twirled around Anders' length, pressed against the most sensitive spots, and Anders saw stars. He repeated Fenris's name as the elf pulled back a fraction, lips and tongue focusing on the tip with beautiful single-minded intensity.</p><p>It took all his self-control not to thrust into Fenris's mouth. Only the knowledge that it'd be much better if he let Fenris do what he wanted kept him from using his grip on Fenris's hair to pull his head down. Fenris was at his best when Anders allowed him full control, and any interference, as tempting as it was, would rob him of whatever pleasures Fenris had planned for him.</p><p>Fenris's mouth was unbearably wet and hot as he sucked harder and took Anders in deep again, swallowing around him, and Anders was going to die. This was too good, he was too close too soon, and then Fenris's hands cupped his behind, encouraging him to thrust up into the elf's mouth.</p><p>Anders was lost. His hands in Fenris's hair clenched and unclenched and he couldn't even see anymore, could only feel what Fenris was doing to him. Justice was as greedy for the pleasure as Anders was, so close to surface that Anders was sure there were blue cracks on his skin.</p><p>He tried to say something, Fenris's name again, perhaps, but all that came out of his mouth was a desperate moan as he spilled himself down Fenris's throat, his entire body trembling at the suddenness of his release as the elf swallowed around him.</p><p>Anders didn't even register it when Fenris let go of him. The next thing he saw was Fenris's face above him, looking at him with heart-breaking fondness, cheeks flushed, lips a little swollen and so very tempting.</p><p>"Kiss me," Anders breathed, voice hoarse, and Fenris did.</p><p>He tasted himself on Fenris's tongue and licked at the elf's mouth, chasing after the traces of his own release. Fenris kept kissing him, hands on his shoulders pinning him down, though the elf must have known he had no desire to go anywhere.</p><p>Anders was breathless by the time Fenris pulled back a little, a hand combing through Anders' hair, eyes dark and watching him with undeniable desire.</p><p>"Your turn, then?" Anders asked. His voice was still not back to normal.</p><p>Fenris hummed softly. "I shall give you a moment." He nuzzled Anders' cheek. "You will need it."</p><p>"That's promising."</p><p>"Isn't it?" Fenris gave him another kiss. "I don't take advantage of your famous warden stamina enough."</p><p>Anders grinned at him. "Perhaps you don't. But you can make up for it."</p><p>"I plan to," Fenris said, a delightfully wicked smile on his lips.</p><p>They kissed for a while longer, easy and comfortable, and then Fenris's mouth travelled down to Anders' neck, a brilliant trace of teeth there making him shudder. His arousal was already returning, and he took Fenris's hand and guided it to where he was hardening again.</p><p>Fenris lifted his head, an eyebrow raised as his fingers wrapped around Anders' flesh. "That was quick."</p><p>"You have your mouth on me, what did you expect?"</p><p>"Idiot," Fenris said, and kissed him. "Well. Roll over, then."</p><p>More than happy to obey, Anders did. Fenris's hands and their lovely lyrium settled on his shoulders, gently massaging, before they worked their way down his back. Anders arched up into his touches, and Fenris made a pleased sound.</p><p>His hands stopped on Anders' waist, and then he reached for the grease waiting next to the bed. Anders watched over his shoulder as Fenris spread the grease over his fingers, and the sheer sight left him breathless with arousal. Those lovely fingers would soon be inside him, exactly where he wanted them. He spread his legs wider, and Fenris settled between his thighs, one hand on his hip.</p><p>The greased fingers pressed against him, circled and danced over his skin, teasing as they spread the slick around, and Anders cursed under his breath. Fenris laughed, pressed harder, and a tip of a finger slipped inside him, only to pull out immediately and begin to circle again.</p><p>"Fenris, please," Anders begged.</p><p>He was sure Fenris would tease him further, but instead, two fingers pushed into him, glorious familiar stretch that made him shiver, and Anders groaned. He needed more, and Fenris gave it to him without asking, fingers shoving deeper into him, twisting just right. Anders closed his eyes and buried his face into the pillow.</p><p>With the deep, hard thrusts into his body, it didn't take long before he was leaking into the bedclothes and both he and Justice wanted more.</p><p>"Fenris, please, I want you inside me <em>now</em>."</p><p>"No," Fenris said. "I think I shall make you come once more before that."</p><p>And there was the teasing he'd been expecting.</p><p>"You're going to—three times?"</p><p>The fingers inside him stilled. "If you are willing."</p><p>Anders didn't need to consider that. "Of course I'm willing, elf. Get on with it."</p><p>Fenris didn't answer, but his fingers resumed their thrusts, curling inside him and hitting the right spot with unfair accuracy until Anders was clutching at the sheets, helpless under the onslaught of pleasure. Slim as Fenris's fingers were, they made up for that with their sheer skill and precision. The lyrium and his intimate knowledge of what Anders liked didn't hurt either.</p><p>Soon, Anders was squirming, rubbing himself against the sheets. Fenris worked his free hand under Anders' hips and wrapped it around him. Anders thrust into Fenris's tight grip, and between that and the rough shoves of the elf's fingers into him, he could not last. He buried his face back into the pillow, both Justice and him crying out as the pleasure crested.</p><p>Fenris kept stroking him, coaxing his release out of him until he felt as if he'd been turned inside out. Only when he whimpered, Fenris's hold of him eased and fingers slipped out of his body.</p><p>For a while, Anders drifted, weightless. He could hear Fenris shifting behind him, and then the elf laid down on top of him, chest to his back, head on his shoulder.</p><p>Sometimes it still surprised him how comfortable he found Fenris's weight on him, how right it felt to be pinned down like this. They were so compatible, the two of them—the three of them, since even Justice fit into their arrangement so well. He was so lucky to have Fenris.</p><p>After a while, Anders twisted to look at him over his shoulder.</p><p>"I'm not doubting your considerable skills at driving me crazy, but how, exactly, are you going to—" The rest of his sentence was lost in a garbled groan as Fenris lit up his markings.</p><p>"I think," Fenris said pleasantly, still glowing, "that putting my fingers back inside you will be quite enough to … get you interested. If that is what you were about to say."</p><p>Anders would have answered, but the active lyrium pressed to his skin, combined with the thought of it inside him when he was already sensitive and overstimulated and still desperate for it, had rendered him speechless. Fenris gave him a smug little smile, and his tattoos dimmed back to their usual whiteness.</p><p>"Tell me when I can," Fenris said, and returned his head on Anders' shoulder.</p><p>Justice would have been ready immediately, but Anders' body had its limits. As he lay there, gathering his strength, the evidence of Fenris's arousal was digging into the curve of his behind, and he couldn't help but to admire the elf's self-control. It had to be torture to wait for so long, but Fenris wasn't complaining. His hands kept touching Anders, stroking his arms and his sides, and his sweet mouth pressed little kisses on the back of Anders' neck and his shoulders. He seemed willing to stay like that forever.</p><p>Anders let himself focus on those lovely touches, relaxed after two brilliant orgasms, until his and Justice's combined impatience got better of him. He was still too sensitive, but they both wanted the lyrium inside him <em>now</em>.</p><p>"I'm ready," he said.</p><p>Fenris's hand paused on his hip, gave it a squeeze. "Are you sure?" He was so patient, so careful, though Anders could hear the need in his voice, the tension of holding back.</p><p>"I'm sure. I want it."</p><p>Fenris didn't ask again. He lifted himself off Anders' back and then caught him by the waist, pulled him up and guided him onto his knees and elbows. Anders held his breath, Justice quiet and tense with need inside him.</p><p>The room filled with blue light as Fenris's lyrium lit up. The tips of his fingers touched Anders right where he needed it, all burning heat. He was slick still, and the fingers slid back in with ease. Fenris crooked them, found the right spot, and Anders whined. The touch was sweet torment, the stretch and the lyrium inside him too much so soon, and Anders would have never let him stop.</p><p>In the end, it didn't take long at all. Those clever fingers thrust into him, stroked him, and Anders was hardening again. It was almost painful and he was gasping, keening softly into the pillow, but he wanted it.</p><p>"Fenris, Fenris," he panted, "that's enough, please just take me—"</p><p>Fenris said nothing, but his fingers slipped out of Anders. Face buried into the pillow, Anders waited, and then there was the slick touch of Fenris's hardness against his opening before it pushed inside. It stretched him wider than Fenris's slender fingers, and Anders squeezed his eyes shut and whimpered as he was filled, so slow, so good.</p><p>Once inside him, Fenris stilled. His hands shook where they were gripping Anders' hips.</p><p>"Fenris?" Anders asked.</p><p>"Sometimes I…" He could hear Fenris swallowing. "Sometimes I forget myself when I'm teasing you, and then when I'm finally inside you…" He rested his forehead between Anders' shoulder blades, the puffs of his breath cooling the sweat on Anders' skin. "If I do not take a moment, I will not last."</p><p>Anders couldn't help but to smile. Impressive as Fenris's self-control was, it had its limits. "Admit it, I'm just too hot for you."</p><p>Fenris's fingers dug into his skin. "You are," the elf said. His voice sounded breathy. "You don't know how I want you."</p><p>"I think I have some idea, actually," Anders said.</p><p>Fenris let out an amused little noise. He pulled out a fraction, then slid back in again, pleasure sparking through Anders. Fenris was panting against his back, his desperate need clear, and Anders loved to be wanted like that, so completely and unapologetically, exactly the way he wanted Fenris.</p><p>Slowly, Fenris's thrust picked up speed until he was ramming into Anders with force that left him keening, high and desperate, each time the elf filled him. With the hands still gripping his hips, Fenris pulled him back into his thrusts, skin slapping against skin. The bed was creaking under them, but neither of them paid it any attention.</p><p>Anders clung to the sheets. The pillow under his face muffled the desperate noises falling from between his lips, and the pleasure inside him was climbing higher, burning like fire. Each of Fenris's thrusts shoved him forward in the bed, and he had to reach out a hand to brace against the flimsy headboard to keep himself from being driven right through it.</p><p>He was so full, so beautifully overwhelmed, and to his shock, he realised he was close again.</p><p>"Please," he mumbled into the pillow. "Fenris, let me, let me, <em>please</em>."</p><p>Instead of answering, Fenris snared a hand in his hair and pulled him into an arch. Anders cried out as the sweet pain in his scalp mixed with the pleasure, made him even more desperate for release.</p><p>"Please," he begged again.</p><p>Fenris's other hand made its way around his hips and wrapped around him. The elf's palm was a little rough against his sensitive skin as it began to stroke, and Anders was <em>right there</em>.</p><p>He would have kept begging, but before he could, Fenris's lyrium lit up, its searing heat sinking into Anders' skin wherever Fenris touched him. Justice lost the last bit of coherence he'd had, and Anders knew he was making noises as he fell over the edge for the third time, the pleasure almost painful, blood rushing in his ears. It was all-consuming and he couldn't focus on anything else but it and the feeling of Fenris inside him, around him, on top of him as he came, toes curling, body clenching around Fenris's length.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>When the world finally cleared, a long while later, he found himself lying flat on the bed, Fenris on top of him but not inside him anymore.</p><p>"Did you…?" His voice sounded rough.</p><p>Fenris hummed, low and content, and nuzzled the back of his neck. "I did." He pressed a little kiss on Anders' skin. "Are you all right?"</p><p>"Perfect," Anders told him.</p><p>Another kiss. "You are," Fenris agreed.</p><p>They stayed like that for a while, both happy to lie there, bodies pressed together, but finally Fenris lifted himself off Anders. With gentle hands, he helped Anders to roll over and then settled to lie half on top of him, head on his chest. Anders let out a satisfied sigh and held the elf close. He had always loved these quiet, comfortable moments after sex, but over the past months, they had grown more and more important to him. Making love was fantastic, but this post-coital bliss was at least as good.</p><p>Justice liked this part even more than Anders did. The spirit was very much into the feeling of Fenris inside Anders' body and the delicious, familiar burn of the lyrium, but afterwards, when he was beyond words and floating on a cloud of pleasure, he was more content than Anders had ever known him to be. Anders hadn't even thought him capable of being so calm and relaxed.</p><p>"Anders?" Fenris murmured, voice low and sleepy.</p><p>"Hmm?"</p><p>"You may not be able to buy me anything, but you have given me other things, taught me so much." He pressed a kiss on Anders' skin. "With you, I'm happier than I have ever been. I hope you know that."</p><p>"I do." He squeezed Fenris closer. "You make me happy too."</p><p>"I know." Fenris's hand tightened on his side. "Sometimes I can't believe how lucky I have been."</p><p>Anders smiled at the ceiling. "I keep thinking the same. We're the luckiest bastards in Kirkwall, aren't we?"</p><p>Fenris laughed a little. "We must be." He reached to pull the blankets over them and somehow managed to wrap himself more tightly around Anders. "Good night, my healer."</p><p>Anders turned to press a kiss on his hair. "Good night."</p><p>He fell asleep holding Fenris, the elf's weight familiar and comforting on top of him. That was, in his and Justice's shared opinion, the only proper way to do it.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"It is getting rather long," Fenris said as he ran a comb through Anders' hair.</p><p>Anders, sitting in a chair in front of him, shrugged. "You can cut it when we get back if you want," he offered</p><p>Fenris made a thoughtful noise. Anders could feel the elf's fingers sinking into his hair.</p><p>"I like it long. I will only cut it if <em>you</em> want that."</p><p>Anders considered it. "Leave it then." He tilted his head back far enough that he could see Fenris's face. "Easier to pull if it's longer, isn't it?" he teased.</p><p>Fenris gave his hair a reproving little tug. "That is not it."</p><p>"I'm sure," Anders said, grinning to himself.</p><p>That earned him another little tug before Fenris combed his hair back and tied it with the beautiful ribbon he'd given Anders the previous night.</p><p>"There." He laid down the comb and pressed a kiss on the top of Anders' head. "All done. My lovely healer is ready for the day."</p><p>"No," Anders said. He'd had his green hair tie in his hand, and now he offered it to Fenris. "I want them both. For luck."</p><p>"Idiot," Fenris said, but he took the ribbon from Anders' hand and tied it on top of the golden-brown one. "Happy now?"</p><p>Anders nodded, and got another kiss on his head for that. It was almost unfair how nice such a simple gesture felt.</p><p>Fenris caught Anders' hand. "Get up, love. Hawke won't be happy if we're late."</p><p>"He's always expecting us to be late," Anders said. "He and Isabela have probably prepared a long list of jokes to tell on our expense, about all the things we must have been up to while they were waiting."</p><p>"I think," Fenris said and tugged Anders to his feet, "that once again, we should let him down."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>When they arrived to the gates where they'd agreed to meet Hawke and Isabela, exactly on time, neither was waiting for them.</p><p>Fenris scowled. "We have never been late. One would imagine they had learnt that by now and been here already."</p><p>Anders squeezed his hand. "They'll be here soon." He shifted a little closer and spoke his next words right into Fenris's pointy ear. "They can't know you tired me out last night so thoroughly that I still wasn't ready for anything particularly time-consuming this morning."</p><p>Fenris flushed. "Shut up, mage."</p><p>Anders laughed, pulled Fenris to his side and pressed a little kiss on his cheek. "I love you too, elf."</p><p>"I knew you two couldn't keep your hands to yourself!"</p><p>Anders jumped a little and turned to look at the direction of the voice. Hawke and Isabela were walking towards them side by side, wearing identical grins.</p><p>"You two are late," Fenris said, frowning. His cheeks were still tinted with red—rather a fetching look on him.</p><p>"More like just in time to stop you from doing anything embarrassing in public," Hawke said. "Ready to go?"</p><p>Anders nodded, and together, the four of them headed out of the gates.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They'd not walked for long before Anders realised Hawke was throwing glances at his and Fenris's direction.</p><p>"We'll behave ourselves," he said. "No need to keep an eye on us."</p><p>"I'm not entirely sure of that," Hawke said.</p><p>Isabela laughed. "By that he means he actually hopes you would get a little"—she wiggled her fingers in the air—"<em>handsy</em> with each other."</p><p>"I do not!" Hawke protested.</p><p>"Of course you do. Who doesn't?"</p><p>"Unlike <em>you</em>, I am above that," Hawke claimed.</p><p>Isabela snorted.</p><p>The two of them kept bickering, and Anders turned to look at Fenris. The elf gave him a tiny, fond smile, the kind that in fact made Anders want to get a little handsy with him, but since they had company, he restrained himself.</p><p>"We've behaved just fine on every single trip Hawke has dragged us with him. I don't know why he thinks we're going to jump each other's bones constantly."</p><p>"Perhaps it has something to do with the way you keep looking at me," Fenris offered.</p><p>"<em>I</em> keep looking at <em>you</em>?" Anders asked, annoyed. "Excuse me, elf, I'm pretty sure <em>you</em> are the one who's looking at <em>me</em> like you want to eat me."</p><p>"Only when no one else can see. You, on the other hand—"</p><p>"You're both guilty," Isabela interrupted. Anders blinked at her—he hadn't noticed she and Hawke had stopped their bickering.</p><p>"No we're not," he insisted.</p><p>"Oh yes you are," Isabela said. "Somehow you both manage to alternate between those sickeningly cute 'I'm so in love with you' looks and the 'I'm currently imagining you naked' ones without a pause. I'm honestly impressed."</p><p>"She's right," Hawke agreed before Anders and Fenris had time to defend themselves. "You both do that."</p><p>Fenris looked genuinely offended, but Anders had to admit, if only to himself, that it was possible they were right. He knew very well he was ridiculously in love and his desire for Fenris had not waned over the months they'd been together, and the looks Fenris gave him had always spoken volumes of the elf's love and lust.</p><p>"Well," he said. "Even if that was the case, which I am not saying it is, we can still behave ourselves. We've always been able to do that."</p><p>"Disappointingly true," Isabela said.</p><p>Anders rolled his eyes at her, but as they kept walking and both Isabela and Hawke were looking away, he reached out to brush Fenris's wind-tangled fringe from his forehead, and Fenris smiled at him again.</p><p>He <em>could</em> keep his hands off Fenris, but sometimes, he did not want to.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They found the bandits they'd been looking for around midday. There were ten of them—not much of a challenge for a group like theirs. Anders stopped next to Fenris to look at the approaching men. It seemed the bandits thought they had a chance, and Anders had no problem proving them wrong.</p><p>"Fenris?" he said.</p><p>The elf turned towards him, an eyebrow raised in question.</p><p>"Don't die," Anders told him.</p><p>Fenris touched the back of his hand with gauntleted fingers and smiled. "<em>You</em> don't die, mage."</p><p>And the bandits were on them. Anders' spell fell the first man before any of them had realised what was happening, stunning the rest of them, and then Fenris raised his sword, light flashing from the blade as he threw himself into the fight and skewered the nearest man with near-casual ease, Hawke and Isabela right behind him.</p><p>Magic burned in Anders' veins as he weaved his spells, lightning flashing and fire following it, precise and deadly. He kept an eye on Fenris, ready to heal if needed, but the elf was a force of nature, unstoppable and as lethal as Anders' spells. At the edge of his vision, Hawke and Isabela weren't any less efficient, and soon, all the bandits were down and not getting up.</p><p>Anders lowered his staff. A quick look to the direction of Hawke and Isabela showed that they were fine, already talking to each other and showing no sign of injuries, and Anders allowed his gaze return to Fenris. The elf had a splatter of bandit blood high on his cheek and decorating the sharp tip of his ear, and he was very much alive and unharmed and smiling at Anders, his bloodstained sword still held in one hand. Anders stopped a few feet from him and met those green eyes that always looked at him with such love that it nearly broke his heart, and. Well.</p><p>They both knew he couldn't afford gifts, but there was something he assumed Fenris still wanted, and maybe it was time to offer it now. He thought about it just long enough for Justice to warn him to be careful, and then the words were out of his mouth.</p><p>"Marry me."</p><p>The silence that followed was absolute. Fenris seemed to have stopped breathing as he stood there, one hand raised to cover his mouth as if to keep in the words that wanted to escape his lips. Isabela and Hawke's chatter could not have been cut off more sharply if Anders had used a knife. Even the rustle of the wind in the grass seemed to have ceased.</p><p>Fenris stayed frozen like that for a long while. Anders waited, and waited, his heart in his throat. He knew he may have made a mistake. This was neither the best time nor the place. He had an awful habit of doing this to Fenris, saying things that were heavy and important, without any warning, and Fenris's reaction had not always been favourable. Even Justice couldn't imagine what Fenris would say, though Anders could feel the spirit's hope and nervousness as clearly as his own.</p><p>Well. What was done was done. If Fenris rejected him now, he would gather the pieces of his broken heart and go on, as long as Fenris was still willing to stay with him despite this misstep.</p><p>"Yes," Fenris said.</p><p>That was all the warning Anders got before the elf dropped his sword and threw himself into Anders' arms. Anders lost his grip on his staff and staggered backwards at the force of the impact, only barely keping his balance, but that didn't matter, because Fenris was there, bloodstained face pressed into Anders' neck, and he had, once again, said <em>yes</em>.</p><p>"Oh," Anders whispered as he wrapped his arms around Fenris's waist. "Really?"</p><p>"Yes." Fenris's hands clenched into the fabric of his robes. "Yes, yes, <em>yes</em>, Anders. <em>Yes</em>."</p><p>Anders tightened his hold of Fenris. Tears were burning in his eyes, and when he blinked, they fell to his cheeks. "Thank you," he managed to say, and Justice's voice echoed the words, "<em>Thank you</em>."</p><p>Fenris said nothing to that, only clung to him as if he'd never let go.</p><p>It may have been the best moment of Anders' life. He could have stayed there forever, locked in this embrace, because <em>Fenris had agreed to marry him</em>. Maker, how was that even possible? He wasn't just the luckiest bastard in Kirkwall; he was the luckiest bastard in entire Thedas.</p><p>"I love you," he whispered, his voice tremulous. "I love you so much."</p><p>"I love you too," Fenris whispered back. It was possible his voice was a little watery. "Thank you—thank you for asking me."</p><p>"I knew I had to. I want to have this forever."</p><p>"Forever," Fenris agreed. Anders would have not thought it possible, but the elf's hold of him tightened a little. "I like forever."</p><p>Anders nuzzled his hair. "I wasn't sure if you'd say yes."</p><p>"Well, you are an idiot." Fenris pulled back just enough to look at him. "My dear, darling idiot husband-to-be."</p><p>And before Anders could respond to that, Fenris kissed him so gently he could hardly bear it. That kiss lead to another, and then another and another until Anders was feeling dizzy with it.</p><p>When they both finally pulled back, Anders found Isabela standing next to them. She was smiling, wide as anything, but he could see the glimmer of tears in her dark eyes.</p><p>"You absolute fools," she said, and pulled them both into a hug. "You damned <em>idiots</em>, I'm so happy for you."</p><p>Anders leant into her hold. "Thank you," he said quietly.</p><p>She smiled and kissed Anders on the cheek, then paused looking at Fenris.</p><p>"You got blood on your face," she said, and placed his kiss on his clean cheek.</p><p>Fenris made a half-hearted attempt to wipe the blood away, but it didn't make much difference. Anders didn't even care.</p><p>"Marriage is a trap and a mistake," Isabela told them, her voice full of warmth and her arms still around the both of them. "You are <em>such</em> idiots. Be happy, darlings."</p><p>"Thank you," Fenris said. He sniffled a little. "I apologise, I—"</p><p>"You two are adorable," Isabela told them. "Just cry, you idiots. That's not the stupidest thing you've done today."</p><p>Fenris let out a helpless little laugh, and Anders loved him so much. He did feel a little like crying some more out of sheer happiness. Isabela gave them both an adoring smile and squeezed them a little closer for a moment before she took a step back.</p><p>Hawke was immediately there to take her place.</p><p>"Congratulations," he said. He gave Anders a bone-crushing hug. "You two can never do anything the normal way, can you?"</p><p>"Wouldn't be us if we did," Anders said.</p><p>Hawke turned to Fenris and hugged him too, grinning. "I'm not sure which one of you I envy more, you lucky bastards." He nudged Anders on the side.  "Was about time you made an honest man out of him! Even if you did it on a field covered in fresh corpses."</p><p>Fenris snorted.</p><p>"You've earned this," Hawke continued. "I'm so happy for you."</p><p>"Not half as happy as I am right now," Anders said. The genuine joy of their friends made him feel almost as good as the knowledge that Fenris had agreed to marry him, to stay with him forever.</p><p>Hawke laughed. "There are going to be even more of those 'I'm so in love with you' looks now, aren't there? You'll be completely insufferable."</p><p>Fenris huffed, his annoyance clear, but he leant into Anders' side and gave him a loving look, proving Hawke right. Hawke smiled at them fondly and shook his head.</p><p>"All right," he said and gave them both a firm pat on the shoulder before taking a step away. "Are we done with our heartfelt congratulations?"</p><p>"For now," Isabela answered, still smiling.</p><p>"Good." Hawke clapped his hands together. "Then let's head home. It seems that all of a sudden, we have a wedding to plan."</p><p>Anders was so ready for that.</p>
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